For more than two decades, Janet has opened her home in regional NSW to children in need, stepping into foster care with honesty and deep respect for the impact of trauma on young lives. What began as careful family conversations has grown into 21 years of care, advocacy and unwavering commitment. Her story shows the emotional weight carers carry, the power of strong support networks and the quiet victories that come from staying grounded and hopeful – even when the work is tough.

When Janet talks about her journey as a foster carer, she begins with quiet disbelief at the passage of time.

“Well, we’ve been caring for 21 years, wow,” she says.

It was never an impulsive decision. She and her husband discussed the idea early in their marriage, imagining a time when their own children were old enough to understand what becoming foster carers would mean.

“It’s something we spoke about very early on in our marriage,” she recalls.

“I think our kids got to an age where we thought they were old enough to understand what it meant for our family.”

Her awareness of foster care had been seeded much earlier in life.

“I hadn’t had any experience with other carers, but I did have experience in high school, with of one of my sister’s friends being taken into care, so that had been in the back of my mind for a long time,” she says.

Janet still remembers the conversations she and her husband had with their children as they prepared to open their home. Their children’s reactions were mixed.

“They were nervous,” she says. “We spoke about other kids needing homes.

“Our youngest was quite concerned about it, but was willing to give it a go.”

Their first venture into caring was through respite care.

“That was just for a weekend, and it was good,” she recalls. “There was very little disruption – the children were quite young. They were younger than our children, and we continued to provide regular respite for those children.”

She learned quickly that carers retained autonomy.

“There’s no pressure to take them every time you’re asked – it’s up to the carer.”

What surprised her most was the complexity of the children’s needs.

“The behaviours of some of the children, and just how traumatised they were by being in care, and the degree of support they needed – that was probably more surprising than anything else,” she explains.

“You don’t realise the emotional impact it has on children when they’re removed from their birth family,” she continues.

Training and connection in those early years helped her find her footing.

“We did a lot of training back then,” Janet reflects. “And there was a good network of carers locally who you could tap into and meet with regularly to bounce things off of.

“People who aren’t foster carers don’t get it at all. They don’t understand the behaviours. It’s a completely different world, the world foster care.”

She lives in Wagga, a town that has changed significantly over her two decades of caring, but the size of the community has helped them maintain pockets of connection.

“We’ve got a Facebook group that that we have going where we post information and any events that we might be holding,” she explains. “There’s a group of us who meet up occasionally also.”

Asked about her biggest lessons, she doesn’t hesitate to say: learning to understand the impact of trauma on the brain and how it impacts the rest of someone’s life.

“It can dictate the trajectory of a person’s life,” she explains. “It starts in childhood. Quite often, it starts before birth. It has this enormous impact on that little body and how it’s going to function in the world.”

“I don’t know that you can undo it,” she adds, “but to support that young person as they grow can help them have a meaningful, fulfilling life.”

For years, Janet has received support through Carers for Kids NSW. She has attended training sessions, served on a Carer Advisory Group (CAG) and advocated alongside them.

“I can ring the helpline and ask what to do in a situation,” she explains. “They’re excellent.”

For her, support is vital.

“You can’t do it without independent support,” Janet states.

When asked what advice she’d offer new carers, especially in regional areas, she says, “work towards having a good relationship with your caseworker. Be respectful and understand that it’s a two-way street.”

Janet doesn’t deny that the experience of being a carer is a tough but rewarding one.

“There were two girls, half-sisters, who came to me as newborns,” she reflects. “Seeing their connection to their birth family has been a real success.

“We’ve also helped young people navigate out of care and continue to support them.”

When asked how she copes through the hardest periods, her answer is straightforward.

“You have to have a sense of humour,” she says with a laugh. “You just do what you’ve got to do.”

“There’s no magic formula,” she explains.

“We just try to stay positive. If you’re a glass half full person, you’ll get there.”

Learn more about the support Carers for Kids NSW provides carers here.